They just said lose weight Felt like
something was wrong with me I end up really struggling money, I lost a crazy amount of weight Hello everyone, My name is Victoria, It’s a pleasure to have you here on my channel I wanted to speak with you about the
beginning of my modeling journey weight struggles, lifestyle changes and how I became healthy again I was scouted when I was
about 17 in my hometown in Russia, my hometown called Ufa the agent came from Moscow and she was looking for girls who could potentially work abroad she liked the way I looked and in the beginning, I didn’t even believe her I was not very confident and I didn’t believe that I could make it abroad as well I was
not very keen on modeling itself Russia is filled with horror stories, especially about modeling abroad it was scary to trust someone
and to realize it’s all gonna be okay and that’s all legit and this is a
real job like most of others and not anything dodgy so that was that I didn’t believe how I
could have been chosen from hundreads of other girls because I always was very
critical about myself I still AM I always felt that this girl is better than me,
she has a better posture or she walks better This is what I had to
work through all my career just trying to build self-confidence and to realize
that we are all unique and we are beautiful and perfect in our own way
but anyway back to the story She scouted me and she spoke to my parents
we signed the contract everything was looking okay, looking back at it I should
have been more careful with signing the contract I’m talking about this in my previous
video, I will put the link right now but at that point of time everything felt
okay and my mother have trusted her so I decided to give it a go, we sign the
contract as I said and I went to Moscow in Moscow we did my first ever Polaroids
and first test shoot. Test shoot is just a simple plane you and the photographer
shooting. Most of the times You don’t have any make up a very simple minimal clothing like t-shirts and jeans is just
to see how you will behave in front of the camera if you are photogenic if you can
open up slightly most of the girls are very scared on the first Test shoot. And I wasn’t any different I couldn’t couldn’t understand what to
do with my body how to move if I should smile or if I shouldn’t how to look
fierce This I didn’t understand for a long time when they told me to look strong I thought that strong meant angry But yes.. strong means something different She sent my polaroids and test shoot to the agencies abroad and Next models signed me worldwide! it was a great update
and I got them as my agency in New York London Paris and Milano I was very excited I was
supposed to go and see them a few months because I had the time opening my
agency offer me to go to Japan to make some money because Asia is mainly a
commercial market so you go there and you sign a contract, you have a guaranteed sum
of money that you will make if you make anything on top you will have more money basically
it’s a little bit not complicated but it has own things so if you want me to talk
more about how modeling in Asia works I can do another whole video because there
is some hidden stones in that market as well for example most of the agencies will make
the guarantee just as big as your expenses what they do they prepay for your flight
accommodation and a driver because in Asia you need to have the driver most of
the times you cannot move yourself because it’s too confusing you don’t understand
the language expenses are covered but as soon as they
deduct it from your guaranteed money There is nothing left the some girl go there with
great expectations of earning that much money and when they end up leaving they have pretty much nothing left it wasn’t the case for me but there are dodgy people and dodgy situations in
any market in this industry so as I said if you want me to talk more about things
like that I’m more than happy to film a separate video
but for now let’s come back to the journey I met there one of my really really
good friends and I met there an amazing woman who really helped me she was a
a little bit older she was a supermodel she taught me how to dress how to pose or
what to say on the castings if the client asks you Japan is very easy
because people don’t speak that well English it’s pretty basic so even with a basic English you can get away and a lot of girls there
are Russian so you can always speak fellow roommates and ask them questions if
you need to it was very very simple And in Japan, you are very sheltered and as I
said I was really lucky because I met some incredible people there was always
surrounded by good energy and thank God for that because it was my first ever
trip and it was a huge huge huge contrast between my city
and Tokyo Tokyo is massive and it feels like it never stops there’s so many people
there’s movement it’s just can be very confusing if you never saw anything like it and I’m sure never did I was lucky enough to be surronded by supportive people there were all good influence
because as well as sheltered as Tokyo is for younger girls because most of
the girls that are going to Tokyo are younger models you can start modeling
there from as young as 12 years old which i think is too young because there
are some not great experience that you can go through There is free
alcohol and there are clubs and you have access to all of it and if you are
not pretty sure what to do with your life yet or what you want from your life
it’s very easy to go to the different path that you don’t want to go but
luckily I was guided I always knew what I wanted and I wanted simply to
work I wanted to be professional I wanted really really really wanted to
make it and I wanted to work abroad I wanted to see the world
basically, I really enjoyed my time in Tokyo you know it was one of and still one of
the best memories that I have from modeling sorry sun was going down really
fast and it becoming very dark so I decided to change my camera
settings so you want me to talk more about anything just leave me a comment
below as well subscribe to my channel give this video a thumpbs up if you like it But back to the big modeling world After my trip to Japan I had a trip planned to go to London and I was really
excited because I was meant to see my agency in London which was Next Models they were really enthusiastic So I was very looking forward to it But before that, I had my finals in school I was studing a lot, not moving much, as a result, I put a little
a bit on weight I didn’t even realize that but as soon as I have landed in London
and they took me to the agency they just look at me like not judgy but kind of there were evaluating me and then they measured me
my hips were 91 which is completely fine and they are 91 now at that point they said but oh
it’s too big you have very big appointments planned You have to see British Vogue You have to see Maida which was a casting director for Calvin Klein at that time and they said you have to go home and lose weight they didn’t say how they just said lose weight obviously, I went on the diet and they sent me home for crying out loud to Russia it was 14 hours plus flight I spent a few hours in London How messed up is that because of 2
centimetres they sent me home it still doesn’t fit in my head because
now I know how industry works and I was absolutely crushed because first I was
really looking forward to that trip and the second I immediately felt like
something was wrong with me but nothing was wrong it was something wrong with
these … people so I went home I started dieting I went on this crazy Atkins diet and
I was eating meat at that time I was cutting out all the carbs and pretty much having
proteins only meat chicken eggs crazy crazy crazy I lost weight I
didn’t have any energy and I didn’t felt great
but I did lost weight I came back for Fashion Week and they’re really happy
and in my head that meant the skinnier I get the happier they gonna get that
means that I’m doing something right as well Fashion Week is such a long
tiring process you work insane hours you leave the apartment at 8 am and return at 1 am. You have castings, fittings and it’s just a lot.. I didn’t have any friends at
this time I hardly still spoke English I spoke a
little bit in order to explain myself but it wasn’t I couldn’t really have a
conversation with anyone I wasn’t fluent and I was not confident
as well as didn’t have money Agency usually give you pocket money but I
think at that time they gave fifty five pounds a week each was okay to kind of
really really on the budget to buy things in the supermarket but you cannot possibly
go out with this money and eat as well we have to pay for your transport, you have to
pay for your phone. I hardly had any money my family is very simple so I didn’t want
to take money from them I end up really struggling with money and as well I
knew in my head the… okay even if I starve a little that means that I’m only gonna get better so during that fashion week I lost crazy amount of weight they started to
say that I’m too skinny and they sent me home because of that I did well on that
fashion week but now they said oh for fashion week if it was okay but you’re
not looking healthy anymore you have to put the weight back on and
that just messed up my head so much because I didn’t know what they wanted
anymore I was too skinny … I was too fat at the same time pretty much it was
like 2 weeks apart these eventts So I was like What’s going on and that messed
up my head for one or two years I couldn’t put the weight back on because
I was worried that I would become too fat again I was never fat I stop cutting so much
on food and when I have more time to go to the supermarket buy my food, cook my
food, of course, I started eating more still to really thrive and to look my
best it was it was difficult for me to try to
allow myself to eat more because I was worried if I would start adding things like chocolate and ice cream and cake wouldn’t I become too much it was really
bothering me for a very very long time I was still modeling not with Next London I went to
Madrid and Barcelona I think I was in Paris with them, they generally like skinnier girls in Paris, Next kept me IN THAT LOOP they were saying or no she still doesn’t
look like we wanted her to look which is already crazy you either like the way I
look or you don’t they I kept me here for around year not letting me to go to New
York which was my main goal all along I was in Europe
I was doing my staff I was studing at the same time but I was just not
happy I always was TRYING MY ABSOLUTE BEST I never felt like I
could reach it so I end up changing the agency because I said Enough is enough if they don’t want me it’s fine I will find something else so I changed to
Elite again worldwide and I went to New York New York was absolutely amazing I
loved it so much I think it was a time when I let it go I had friends there and
lifestyle was amazing I love that it gave me so many opportunities castings were all the time New York was really busy It was just a very happy place for me
but then my visa expired so I had to go back to renew it You can’t do nothing
worst for your career rather than overstay your visa I had to go back to
London which I hated at that point This place only reminded me about that crazy
experience how I felt lonely, ashamed of myself just really confused I came back here I
had a great agency this time Storm really was amazing for me at the beginning Storm models
they were like my family for a long time and they grew me as a person, they grew me as a model a lot I’m really thankful for my first booker here She was a dream You only need a good Booker who believes in you and who will push
you and that is most important in modeling In London, I started to realize
that it’s not about how you look but how you feel much more it took me as I said
1 or 2 years to overcome that trauma at the beginning I started to discover plant-based
lifestyle I was still eating meat and just realised that I’m not particularly
feeling great after a meal if I had it late at night or if I had too much of it I started to ask myself question Why? as well I took an allergy
test and I realised that they thrive from plants I decided to first go pescetarian, then vegetarian and then plant based it just
worked for me it might not work for you and may not work for everyone I
understand and respected so please respect my point of view and respect my
story I know that there are lots of trolls out there so please reframe from commenting because I will delete all the negative comments life is too
short for negativity and I’m sharing my story so maybe it will help someone at least I hope that or it will be entertaining I don’t know but it’s scary
to put yourself out there Please have respect for that It is just my
story I’m not saying but this is a remedy or this is how everyone should do It is my experience and this is my life journey when I decided to go plant based and as well I’m not a strict vegan this just has to be said as well I’m not
putting myself in a box basically because I don’t want to have any
limitation at this point I spent lots of precious minutes in my life just putting
myself in this boxes like you can eat that, can’t eat this. You can do that, you can not do this I don’t want to do that anymore I want to enjoy life and to
live to the fullest plants give me energy
I started to do sports like I never done in my life I was never sporty I started
to run longer distances to do HIIT I started to do yoga pilates
I really fell in love with moving my body and this is all because I made
these changes to my lifestyle as well I’m happy I finally was in peace with
what I was eating I could eat chocolate I could eat ice
cream I could eat whatever I wanted without feeling guilty or without
feeling I need to watch next day what I’m going to eat I don’t have this
anymore or at least it went down to the minimum of course I will still doubt
myself but I’m only human so this concludes the beginning I hope
if you like my story if you have any questions it’s my story you
may like it or may not like it I hope that you liked this video give thumbs up
if you did and subscribe to my channel if you have any questions or if you have
any suggestions or if you want to me to film any specific video about
modeling in different markets if you have any questions towards modeling
please ask them I will answer to everyone if they are coming from a good place
and I’m sending you lots of love! see you soon:)


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